independence day, pt.2

...contd.

At return I entered the house prompt and got a memory. Its always some trouble or another. Some haunts don’t leave as immediately as we might like.

Times been hard sometime
In my day I drank quite a bit
That came to pass
but other vice replace it

I’ve eaten and not
for comfort and control
and I done other things
that taken a toll
on me,
I’ve been down a time or three
And religion is complex

Wandered off path
Projected changed image for love
Actions rested on those of each new idol
And identity changed with each new beau
Flexible is good, but fluid—no

Taken things out on others often
Did not intend to but excuses lag
and intention alone cannot justify when
Those I love serve as punching bags

Don’t do what I want
Motivated by desire for company
Don’t want to end up sittin’ just me...

[Name removed]: Easy evocative fear, but we won’t die alone dear. Friend—when we do end, the pumping of heart comes to close and concludes, and churning organs stop operation and synapses cease to fire, and we are alone, this is—fine (poetry this isn’t) or okay or perhaps even as it should be, but before that time our lives will be rich with relationship or six and that is good. Don’t flex for false—I like you unchanged.

When I think on it-
oh shit.
Summer is slipping so quickly away
Eroding with the passing of each day
Bye bye, oh going so hurriedly by
I’m afraid it will come to rapid end
And I will have spent all time with only one friend
Nebulous invisible lines crossed after 11pm
Contained in the very same walls
Distance once too far now too small
And now it is over, this whole half-summer now gone
With nothing to show but a curveball and bruised arm
Injure and such, all harm and alarm
(I don’t blame ‘m
it takes two to tango—us, me
and certain I’m no innocent party)

But still, in all this I find
—oh yeah—a return of me
and this, I guess—I know—I don’t mind.